Post by pielover19 on Jun 30, 2016 23:37:01 GMT -5
Announcer:
WELCOME TO THE BATTLE OF HISTORY! Today, it's Chinese Dictator MAO ZEDONG vs. show host STEVE HARVEY!
Mao:
Why, herro, I'm here to cause a family feud!
I let dads report their wifes so my soldiers can get some rape in the nude!
And when you read those letters all of your points are construed,
This is the Red Rising, and it's only the prelude!
Hanging with celebrities, wasting lazy woman's lives,
While your stuck to one girl, I can have a million wives!
This is a real-ass whopping, so KUNG-POA!
Get ready for more, THIS IS APOCALYPSE MAO!
Steve:
It's the worst person in the world coming down the hall,
I'm entertaining millions while you kill 'em all!
You rape people for laughing at you, I keep it mellow.
Look, you're a real life stay-puft marshmallow!
Living in a gigantic bubble, you need Jesus.
Heck, I would even settle for Yeezus!
The new language pushed the stereotype of ching-chong,
and the survey says that everything you did was wrong!
I'm just saying you're horrible, do you get my riff?
You made a big leap forward, INTO A CLIFF!
Mao:
Little, Steve Harvey, you ain't seen nothing yet!
I'm gonna squish you like I squished Tibet!
Best get the only answer on your board, and it's that you're facing your end.
Say hello to my LITTLE FRIEND!
(A crate comes out. Mao presses a button. A very round individual comes out.)
Announcer:
MY GOD! It's Kim-Jon Un!
Kim:
YO, I'M KIM JONG UN AND I'M READY TO RAP!
MY PEOPLE THINK I'M A GOD, THEY EVEN PICK UP MY CRAP!
WHO NEEDS HAPPY PEOPLE WHEN YOU CAN HAVE CAKE!
THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS THAT THIS IS IT'S ULTIMATE FATE!
I'VE GOT SHINY GLEANING MISSILES HEADING TOWARDS SEOUL,
I'M FEELING HUNGRY, LET MY EAT YOUR SOUL!
Steve:
I'm usually speechless after sex jokes, but this is going to far!
Plus you've ate so much food, how do you even fit into North Korea's one car?
Mao, you basically brought me a piece of butter.
You brought I joke, but I can make this battle better with another!
(A helicopter comes down!)
Announcer:
THIS BATTLE KEEPS GETTING BETTER! IT'S VINCE MC MAHON!
(Vince waves his hand, but gets shot.)
Announcer:
Wait, what? MY GOD, THERE'S A SNIPER! And he's Steve Burns, the host of Blues Clues!?!?
(LE CLIFFHANGER!)
WELCOME TO THE BATTLE OF HISTORY! Today, it's Chinese Dictator MAO ZEDONG vs. show host STEVE HARVEY!
Mao:
Why, herro, I'm here to cause a family feud!
I let dads report their wifes so my soldiers can get some rape in the nude!
And when you read those letters all of your points are construed,
This is the Red Rising, and it's only the prelude!
Hanging with celebrities, wasting lazy woman's lives,
While your stuck to one girl, I can have a million wives!
This is a real-ass whopping, so KUNG-POA!
Get ready for more, THIS IS APOCALYPSE MAO!
Steve:
It's the worst person in the world coming down the hall,
I'm entertaining millions while you kill 'em all!
You rape people for laughing at you, I keep it mellow.
Look, you're a real life stay-puft marshmallow!
Living in a gigantic bubble, you need Jesus.
Heck, I would even settle for Yeezus!
The new language pushed the stereotype of ching-chong,
and the survey says that everything you did was wrong!
I'm just saying you're horrible, do you get my riff?
You made a big leap forward, INTO A CLIFF!
Mao:
Little, Steve Harvey, you ain't seen nothing yet!
I'm gonna squish you like I squished Tibet!
Best get the only answer on your board, and it's that you're facing your end.
Say hello to my LITTLE FRIEND!
(A crate comes out. Mao presses a button. A very round individual comes out.)
Announcer:
MY GOD! It's Kim-Jon Un!
Kim:
YO, I'M KIM JONG UN AND I'M READY TO RAP!
MY PEOPLE THINK I'M A GOD, THEY EVEN PICK UP MY CRAP!
WHO NEEDS HAPPY PEOPLE WHEN YOU CAN HAVE CAKE!
THE WHOLE WORLD KNOWS THAT THIS IS IT'S ULTIMATE FATE!
I'VE GOT SHINY GLEANING MISSILES HEADING TOWARDS SEOUL,
I'M FEELING HUNGRY, LET MY EAT YOUR SOUL!
Steve:
I'm usually speechless after sex jokes, but this is going to far!
Plus you've ate so much food, how do you even fit into North Korea's one car?
Mao, you basically brought me a piece of butter.
You brought I joke, but I can make this battle better with another!
(A helicopter comes down!)
Announcer:
THIS BATTLE KEEPS GETTING BETTER! IT'S VINCE MC MAHON!
(Vince waves his hand, but gets shot.)
Announcer:
Wait, what? MY GOD, THERE'S A SNIPER! And he's Steve Burns, the host of Blues Clues!?!?
(LE CLIFFHANGER!)
