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Post by pielover19 on Mar 31, 2020 18:33:20 GMT -5
The time on the clock was 2:00, in the morning.
Obnoxious pop music played distantly in the background. The florescent lights were almost blinding, and rain was pattering against the windows. This was the Jos Santos La Plata Highway 87 Intersection Shelleron Gas Station, where Dilz was sitting behind the counter, bored out of his mind. The store was decent enough for a gas stations. Dilz used to diligently clean and organize everything, but after a few weeks of being ridiculed by his boss for the most minor of errors, he just sat there and did nothing. His boss yelled at him more, but he didn't really mind. It seems like every single time I try to do something, he just yells at me for it! And my paychecks late, and I need to pay rent or else Nelvin will get all pissy with me, and it's not like I'm even doing anything with my life except sitting here and occasionally selling a bag of peanuts to a drunkard!
Dilz sat there fuming as the bell at the entrance rang, and the door opened. You usually were supposed to give a greeting, but he had no time for that...
"Hey, why are you just sitting there? Not even giving the customer greeting? COME ON! AND LOOK AT THE STORE! GAPS EVERYWHERE! THE PORK RIND SECTION LOOKS ATROCIOUS!"
This was the worst time for The Boss to come in! He was a greasy, Italian looking guy who was wearing khakis, a belt, and a wife beater. Quite an eccentric, he also had his hair in a mullet. The type of face you want to pummel... "HEY, ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?"
You know, he fakes an Italian accent. He must've watched The Sopranos and thought he could be a cool guy like that too.
"THE CRACKERS! THE BEEF JERKY! MY GOD, WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE! I SHOULD FIRE YOU RIGHT NOW!"
This is my life. I sit here, I think about how bad things are, I get yelled at by my boss, I have no friends, I have no money, I have no skill, it's all wasted! WASTED!
"THIS POPCORN RIGHT HERE IS OUT OF CODE! MY GOD, AND THE FRIDGE IS OPEN! MY COKES! THAT'S GONNA COST ME THOUSANDS!"
I honestly think he hired me as his punching bag. When he comes in this late, he's usually really drunk...
"HEY, I'M TALKING TO YOU! WHAT, MOUTH STITCHED CLOSE!"
The Boss snickered after that. He seemed to sway back and forth as he approached me.
"I OUGHTA TEACH YA A LESSON! A LESSON FOR RUINING MY STORE AND THE REPUTATION OF SHELLERON!"
He stumbled over and attempted to punch me, but instead hit a little glass frog at the register, one of the souvenir ones. It smashes easily.
"DAMAGING STORE PROPERTY HUH? THAT'S GONNA GET YOU IN A LOT OF TROUBLE!"
I...
I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE!
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Post by pielover19 on Mar 31, 2020 18:38:24 GMT -5
Oh God... Oh God... Oh God...
The pole the beef jerky hung on was a much more effective weapon than I thought. As such, Dilz is in quite a lot of trouble now. He scrambled outside the store and washed himself in the rain.
Oh God... I can't be put into jail for something like this! Ah, ah, what am I supposed to do? God, I know I never really talked to you that much, but please, PLEASE, give me some slack here! Oh God... Oh God... Oh God...
What will Dilz do?
A. Go back into the store, attempt to cover up the crime scene.
B. Head home immediately, maybe he can hide out there or at least gather supplies.
C. Turn yourself into the police. Maybe he can plead self-defense?
D. They're probably already after me. I need to escape into the woods, and quickly!
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Post by Digi on Mar 31, 2020 18:58:51 GMT -5
A. Gotta cove rour tracks a bit.
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Post by Deleted on Mar 31, 2020 20:20:17 GMT -5
D we shall become the ultimate woods man
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Post by mrfuzz111 on Mar 31, 2020 20:34:43 GMT -5
D.
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Post by pielover19 on Mar 31, 2020 21:19:41 GMT -5
The woods! The woods are a safe place, it'll take them days to find you and by then you might be able to escape to the desert! Dilz, still panicking, runs into the woods downhill from the store, adrenaline pumping. The rain is pounding hard against him. Hey, at least it'll wash his clothes. He tries to head straight ahead, not looking back. They'll never find me here, he thinks! He keeps on running, and running, and running, getting further and further away from the crime. This is actually a pretty good strategy... I fell on a tree root and landed face first into the mud. God, I was feeling so nice, floating along the forest, and then boom! Covered in mud. Well, not the worst thing I've been covered in today. "Hey guy." I got up and brushed some of the mud off of my clothes. I really hate feeling di- WAIT. WHO WAS THAT? A deep voiced snicker came from the woods. "You're really hard to chase down, you know? I expected a lot less from you. You're surpassing expectations." This isn't good, strange calm people's voices in the woods isn't good, I need to RUN! Dilz began to run in the same direction he was going in, but he was grabbed by his collar by this mysterious man. He was then thrown directly into the mud puddle again. "There's no need to be shy."
The man's boot went up and struck down on Dilz, making him gurgle in the mud pit.
"You killed one of our men."
Oh God, please let me rot in jail instead of dying out here, jail sounds really nice, I may even get some cigarettes and extra food, please just let me go to jail...
"Good job."
Huh? The main put his foot off of Dilz' back and pulled him up.
"W-what?" Dilz managed to spit out.
"You are now the 100th ranked assassin, as you killed the previous 100th ranked assassin, Tony Soprano. I never liked the guy myself."
"S-same..."
"Now, to officiate your entry into the assassin's league, please sign this contract..."
Wait, assassin's league!?!? What the hell? I don't want to be a part of the Assassin's league! Am I dead? Is this just a dream after my death? Did I actually die falling down that hill to the woods? God, what a pathetic way to die!
"You know, the contract is getting a bit wet..." the man sounded extremely hostile.
What will Dilz do?
A. Refuse The Contract B. Sign The Contract
C. Run Away D. FIGHT HIM! THAT'LL WORK OUT WELL!
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Post by Digi on Mar 31, 2020 23:37:48 GMT -5
I don't think he'll take no for an answer soooo
B
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Post by Bloodmancer on Mar 31, 2020 23:54:44 GMT -5
Look I only see one reasonable option here...
B
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Post by Deleted on Apr 1, 2020 0:00:18 GMT -5
So either death or become an assassin.
Welp we are Assassins now guyz
Oh right I also chose B
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Post by pielover19 on Apr 1, 2020 0:24:32 GMT -5
The contract must be signed, you probably don't have a choice. Dilz takes the pen given to him by the man, and scribbles his signature onto the contract. The man quickly folds up the contract and places it in his pocket. "Thank you. You put up a lot less resistance than most other recruits. I see some potential in you!" "Uh... thanks..." "Now, there's a lot to explain, and I don't like being out in the rain, King. So let's head to a warmer place." "King?" "Oh yeah! I forgot to do my cool intro bit! Usually they protest a little bit before I do it. Don't worry, I'll go softer than I usually do." I honestly have no idea what's happening. "Alright, let me start it. My name is Bishop, and you are the King, though you may not think about it that way. Why is the Bishop beating up the King? Because a King can only move one space diagonally, but a bishop can move across the whole board!"
The guy then picked me up again and threw me into the mud.
"Oh, that was a bit too hard. Sorry, I get absorbed into my acting..."
Dilz's consciousness slipped away.
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Post by pielover19 on Apr 1, 2020 0:51:39 GMT -5
Dilz wakes up in what seems to be an interrogation room. Across from him, that "Bishop" guy from earlier sits.
"Yeah, sorry for throwing you down a bit hard. Force of habit! Here, take this as an apology."
The guy threw a small wrapped candy, one of those generic hard candies that old ladies like, towards me, and flashed a big smile.
"Anyways, we've moved to a much more comfortable area. Let me tell you, you can run, man! You went all of the way into the forest, it was a nightmare to get out!"
Bishop takes out an identical piece of candy and starts to suck on it.
"So, pretty cool opening lines, huh? I made them myself. Good stuff!"
"Yeah... Hey, could you tell me what's going on?"
"No time for small talk? Ah, that's the best part! Oh well, it's a huge info dump. You sure you want it?"
"Yeah..."
"Ok then. You are now an assassin. Every assassin has a rank, you kill the assassin, you take the rank. So, since Mr. Soprano is dead, you took his rank of 100th place. Pretty decent actually."
OH SHIT! The body, it's still there! I'm gonna get arrested!
"Oh, bring back bad memories? An accidental murder perhaps? That's really good, well, not for you of course. But it's a good backstory. Boy, I got lucky with this one! Anyways, don't worry about it. We here at the Assassins United Association have covered up the murder. The guy just disappeared off of the face of the earth. So don't worry about it! Psychological trauma aside, you aren't going to be in legal trouble no matter what you do here. Now, onto the next big point. Please direct your eyes to your wrist!"
Looking at my wrist, there seemed to be a white watch of sorts with a digital screen. It actually looked pretty cool...
"This is your connection to the world of Assassination! In it, you can see many things, like the assassin directly below and above you. The main purpose of the Assassins United Association is to get assassins to rise to the highest rank possible by any means necessary. Now, you could get lucky and kill the first ranked assassin, but you don't know who the first ranked assassin is! Hell, I don't even know it. So it's usually best to go up one by one."
The wrist flashed a screen. It had, in the middle, the number of 100 and my name. Above me was the number 99 and the name Officer Radynzch Kowalski, and below it was the number 101 and the name Lumberrer.
"You can choose a flashy name for yourself later. You can also see a map of the area, and access a store with a variety of helpful items, some of which the average man would think impossible! There are some other functions of this device, but I'll let you find them out yourself. I'll give you a little hint, we've put GPS and heartbeat monsters on them. It's how we knew old Soprano died, and arrived so quickly! Now, you may ask what is in it for you. Well, you might not have, considering you seem to be quite a passive person. Not that that's a bad thing, of course! Well, since the old Shelleron station will probably close, we'll give you compensation 1.5X your job there, and a recruiting bonus of four months wages!"
"Man, I need that. That old bastard didn't even pay me..."
"I assure you, the checks will be delivered on time. Now, in exchange, and as detailed in the contract, you will have to kill one other assassin per week, besides if you are in the top 10 of assassins. If this requirement is not fulfilled, we will activate the bomb hidden inside this device and kill you and any unlucky innocents nearby instantly. In addition, a breach of this agreement will also lead to the surprising discovery that Mr. Soprano died by a homicide to the cruel murderer Dilz, and we will ensure your legacy and your family's legacy will be stomped into the ground. Here is a copy of the contract." Bishop hands me a piece of paper laying out these terms, which I tuck into my pocket alongside the candy.
"You know, this is usually when people begin to scream and say "OH NO, I HAVE TO BECOME A MURDERER, HOW CRUEL!"
"I just woke up from fainting, man. If the world ended I probably couldn't be able to react with anything but indifference."
"How convenient! You know, I really do like you. Here, I'll give you a hint." Bishop slides a vanilla colored file folder towards you. On it is a picture of a decently fat man in a police outfit.
"This is rank 99, Officer Kowalski, and has details about him. His occupation, his items, a few interesting facts about him. Let's say it's a secret part of your sign-up bonus."
"...Alright..."
"Now, you may be wondering where we are. Sadly, you won't be able to know that until we can ensure your loyalty. So please excuse me..."
Bishop got out of his seat and walked towards me. Wait, what's he doing? That kinda looks like what he did be-
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Post by pielover19 on Apr 1, 2020 1:01:48 GMT -5
The rain is pelting against Dilz's face. He drearily opens his eyes, and slowly gets up. He realizes that his pockets are quite heavy, and that he woke up in front of his apartment complex. He quickly enters the complex, takes the elevator to his door, and enters his room. It's completely dark, only lit up by a computer screen with an exceptionally underdressed woman in anime style with text over it.
"You're coming home early," Nelvin sneakily remarks. "Where's my rent, jackass?"
I stumble towards my bedroom. God, sleep would be pretty great right about now...
"Dude, where's MY RENT?"
I fish into my pockets and feel a huge bundles of bills. Must be my sign in bonus. I throw one towards Nelvin.
"HOLY CRAP! How did you get this much money? You aren't doing drug deals or anything, right? Can I use the extra to buy some figurines?"
"Do whatever the hell you want..."
I reach the door to my bedroom, close it, lock it, and welcome the safe and comforting world of pillows, blankets, and dreams...
Dilz wakes up, feeling refreshed, and stretches his arms. His eyes go to the device on his wrist. Oh yeah. Yesterday happened.
What will Dilz do?
A. Get out of the bedroom, maybe talking to Nelvin will help clear up your mind.
B. Look at the case file for this Kowalski guy. You don't want to be blown up.
C. Examine the strange device on your wrist. Maybe you can find something interesting about it?
D. Screw Nelvin, I don't want to talk to that guy. Take the window out. You might fall a decent amount, but nothing too much to worry about.
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Post by empireoffire on Apr 1, 2020 1:22:22 GMT -5
C looks like a good time.
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Post by mrfuzz111 on Apr 1, 2020 2:28:02 GMT -5
B, let’s get some info.
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Post by Bloodmancer on Apr 1, 2020 6:16:08 GMT -5
I say c, If our job is to murder assassins... (Because that makes any sense and something fishy is definitely going on) then we should get as much info as we can, because if this is real then someone is also trying to murder us.
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