Session 0

Specifically, B.

Well I have no context but, F seems like the best option

You yell and leap at the one that hasn't drawn his weapon yet.  You take two steps then jump, landing on his kneecap and jumping up.  The cult-y guy crumples under the weight of his body on his now-shattered kneecap and crouches down just as a loud snap announces the release of a bolt behind you.  It flies whizzes past and finds a new home in the meat-mountain you're currently climbing.  Between the jump up and the guy falling over, you're already halfway there!  And they were nice enough to add a hand-hold for you to climb on in the form of a bolt half buried in the guy's gut.  You boing off of that and right up to his chin with a rising, spinning uppercut to the jaw before slinging yourself over and bringing your heel up in a follow-up hook against the guy's chin.  Two loud cracks, at least two busted teeth!  While the other robe-person reloads his crossbow, you use your ankle and his neck to hold yourself up, dangling upside-down over his shoulder.

There's a loud crashing noise, followed by a less-loud squelch-y noise, then a louder roar as the barbarian slams a battleaxe into the shooter.  Well, that solves the problem!  Change of plans.  You launch three quick jabs into the top of his spine, pop-pop-pop.

He crumples even more and uh-oh lands right on the head of the bolt.  Yep.  This man is dead.  Probably.  That's not good.  If this isn't a cult, the guard's gonna be angry.  Real angry.  But also normal religious people don't usually keep crossbows up their big sleeves, only cultists.  You think?  If they do, they've never shown them to you.  Maybe you should check sometime!  Even if it's not a crossbow, they might have fun stuff in there, why else would they have such big, floppy why is there yelling?

You snap out of thinking and notice the sound of yelling and probably also fighting coming from the inner sanctum place.  Weird!  You aren't even there yet.  The orc barbarian and your bard-friend are also here.  The bard looks a bit unhappy with all the blood and murder, but the orc is really, really excited that he got to battleaxe someone.  Your rogue-friend shouldn't be down there.  Probably?  He should probably be upstairs somewhere.  And that's not where the fighting sounds are, which is weird.  Hm.

(A) Oh well!  Door kicking time.
(B) Weird things should be investigated!  Go upstairs.
(C) We made a loud distraction, time to go!  Leave.

(1) Try to drag the other 2 with you!
(2) Let the other 2 do what they want.
(3) Try to send the others somewhere else and leave you alone!

Mmmmmmnope!  Not going in there.  You make for the stairs, zipping off ahead of everyone else.  You jump up two before realizing the others aren't following you, so you turn around.  You run back and grab the monk by the hem of her pant leg, dragging her towards the stairs.  "C'mon, up-up-up!" you insist.

The bard giggles, despite the blood and gore, and scoops you up.  "Yes, yes."  She places you on her shoulder.

"This isn't what I meant!" you insist.

"I know.  But you're just so adorable," she says, making for the stairs.  She turns back to your half-orc friend.  "Come along, there's probably more killing to do upstairs."

"But...  I didn't get to do anything but snoop around in filthy fuckin' sewers all day, I haven't had a good scrap in hours!"

"First we find our friend, then we commit violence, OK?  It's just not the same without him sneaking behind their leader and slitting his throat in the middle of his big speech, hm?"

"Hmmmmph...  I guess."  The half-orc gives another wistful look at the door, then follows you and your bard-mount up the stairs.

The rogue isn't hard to find.  In fact, he finds you as soon as you round the corner.  He holds a finger to his mouth to shush you.

"Hey!  We were worried because we heard an alarm so we kicked down the door but the guards tried to shoot us with crossbows and then we didn't see you-"

The rogue moves his finger to your mouth instead, muffling you as you continue, then motions to a small window overlooking the chapel.  Inside, you spot the four from the inn that you were tracking... in the middle of butchering a dozen more of the robed cultists.

"Well, darn," the bard says.  "My info said they were part of this cult, but I guess they were just working on infiltrating it."

"Are you sure?" you ask.

Their psion mentally grabs one of the cultists with a glowing, spectral hand, flips him upside-down, and bashes his head into the ground while you watch.

"Pretty sure," the bard says.

(A) OK!  Get into the fight!  Jump right through the window, slide down the wall, and jump onto the nearest cultist!
(B) Sit and enjoy the show for a bit
(C) Walk back downstairs, kick down the door, and join in
(D) Identify the exits and try to set up an ambush for any cultists that try to escape
(E) Get out of here before the guards show up
(F) TURN THIS INTO A THREE-WAY BATTLE!

"Let's cut off the exits and take care of any that try to escape!" you interject. "Dibs on that side door over there!"

"That's-" the bard begins.

"Dibs on the front!" the barbarian yells, turning and bounding out of the room almost as fast as you do.

"Well, I suppose it is a plan, at least," the bard mutters.

The rogue shrugs.  "Should be fine.  Those cultists aren't putting up much of a fight.  So long as we don't pick a fight with those four."

The bard sighs.  "Not an ounce of tact between those two..."

You make it down the stairs, sliding down the railing and overtaking the barbarian's long strides.  You dart through a small door and into a hallway, making a few guesses before kicking a door hard enough to break its lock and out into an alley you go!  And then comes the waiting.  Right.  This plan requires waiting.  You hadn't considered the waiting.  Now you're stuck waiting.  And waiting.  Gods you hate waiting.  But then the waiting stops!

A lady in cult-y robes comes running, barefoot, down the hall.  A blue-skinned xeph, you think, but between the hood and the gloom and the veil on her face it's really hard to tell for sure.  She's carrying a freshly blood-covered dagger in one hand.  She turns to fire a bolt from a hand crossbow towards someone behind her before continuing to run.  Towards you!  You press up against the doorframe.

(A) Trip her!
(B) Jump in front of her and try to stop her
(C) Slam the door shut!
(D) Wait until she passes and try to follow her
(E) Try to grab the hem of her robe as she runs by and ride her to her destination
(F) Punch her in the face!
(G) Yell REALLY loud

She is running very fast, but you are very small.  Just as she runs by, you jump out and grab onto the hem of her robe.  You give your wings a little flap-flap to make your weight less obvious.  She whirls around as soon as you grab her, knife pointed, but doesn't spot anything - seeing as you're now behind her!  She turns and keeps running.  She's VERY fast once she gets going.  Xeph are famously good sprinters.  It's a good thing you're holding on.  Even a monk would struggle to catch up to her once she gets going, especially once she uses some weird magic spell to start jumping really good.  She leaps right onto the roof of a building - with you still riding her dress - and over the heads of a few guards rushing to the scene of the fight.  Oh!  That's a problem.  Well, it's not your problem.  But it's a problem for your friends!  And also the cult.  Well, being dead is the cult's main problem now.  Other than the one you're riding!

She goes far, far from the church - at least 3 whole blocks - before finally slowing down.  She hops down from the roof, rolling and almost crushing you, before grabbing a sewer grate cover.  She slips in, and you fall after her.  Inside, she takes a moment to collect herself.  She looks back and forth for a moment before heading to the... north?  Frontwise.  You're not really sure.  It's very dark, and you weren't great at directions in the light!

You make your way through the sewers for a bit, past lots of twists and turns and one small hole in the side she has to crawl through - you never would've even noticed it.  More turns, and finally stopping at a brick wall.  She starts tracing a rune on the side, which glows as she marks it.  Interesting!  You think you could copy it.

(A) Knock her out and drag her to the surface!  Prisoner!
(B) Kill her immediately
(C) Well this is as good a place for an interrogation as anywhere!
(D) Sneak away while she's distracted, mark where this was and the rune that was used
(E) Stay on her butt!  Keep riding!
(F) Something feels bad about the sewers.  Run immediately.

You hop off her dress and fly up a bit.  You give her a tap on the shoulder.  She jumps a bit and quickly turns around, but you're already spinning a kick into her face.  You smash her before she can react.  The good ol' heel-face turn.  She tries for the knife, but you quickly lash out and jab her wrist.  She tries to start chanting a spell, but you reach into her mouth and grab hold of her tongue, giving it a tug and a twist and using her pained reaction to headbutt her.  She goes stumbling back, falling into the wall, and you dive into her lap, quickly firing off three jabs into her diaphragm before leaping up and finishing with an uppercut to the jaw.

Easy!

Now you just need to carry her out of here.

Not as easy.

Fortunately, after a quick check of her person, you find she had a bit of rope.  You wrap it around her ankles and start dragging her behind you.  When you make it to an entrance to the sewer, it's another problem.  You punch the grate off and drag the rope up, struggling to haul her up behind you.

While you're grunting and groaning with effort, finally dragging the witch out of the sewer, you draw a fair bit of attention.  A pair of guards quickly becomes a half-dozen as they stare at you in a mix of shock and more shock.

"Oh, hi!" you say.

You get an expectant stare in response.

(A) "OK, bye!" (leave her behind)
(B) "OK, bye!" (drag her with you)
(C) "Bounty, please!"
(D) "I saved her from a big, mean sewer monster that was gonna eat her up!"
(E) "I was out on a walk and I found her doing weird stuff!  I'll show you."
(F) "She had a bloody dagger so I followed her!  Suspicious."
(G) "So my friends and I were chasing this cult but then the cult people we were following weren't actually cult people and they were chasing other cult people and then they started fighting and she ran away so I rode her and-"